18.03.12

*

02.10.11

Open Your eyes, face Your fears, live Your dreams, hide Your lies, speak Your truth, sing Your song, walk Your road, break Your mirror, fix Your mistakes, think Your thoughts, be Yourself. Tell Your story.
They'll never understand. You might as well keep it in and go insane. I know, I did.

23.06.11

30 Seconds To Mars @ Tallinna Lauluväljak, 21.06.11.



Thank you, 12 000 people. We rocked it. <3

29.05.11

School is almost over. I can't wait. Tomorrow is the last proper day, i think, and then i can rest. If you can call it resting... There are a few performances coming up with the orchestra (that i'm so desperate to leave) and a few birthdays to attend. I will find the time to rest, though. I promise.
We had a trip to Viljandi yesterday. We had to perform at the Viljandi's Song Festival with our orchestra. The whole day ended up so bad, i don't think i've ever cried so much. I just broke. And this time i didn't break in half, i broke into a thousand pieces. I don't know how much longer i'm gonna stand living like this. I miss the time everything was nice, about 3 years ago. I'd give anything to be the same person i was back then. Yeah, i've changed alot, and i find it absolutely miserable. I used to be so happy, positive, innocent little girl. When did i become so gloomy? I don't know.
Well, i'm gonna end this post now, before it get's even more miserable.
Take care, people.

24.04.11

How come do i feel so ugly these days? Telling me otherwise won't help. Fml.

At least i found a new hobby and i really think i'm gonna stick with it. I love it. <3

02.04.11

Why the hell am i so tired of everything? I sound so ''emo'' again, bleh. I just want to quit school and music school, and just exist for some time. But i can't. Why the hell is summer so far away?
And also, why isn't there a real fairytale? If a guy likes a girl and the girl likes him back, why won't they live happily ever after? I guess they're too scared to tell eachother, being afraid of rejection. This is just stupid.
Everything is stupid. I want to sleep for a week and wake up to see that my whole world is a fairytale.
Also, i live with a drunk, how lovely.

23.03.11

It's midnight as i start writing this post. And i have no idea what to write. I guess i can tell you that i've been doing nothing special during the last days. I did go ice skating on saturday, before celebrating my mom's birthday (which was actually on the 22th). Yesterday (22th), i was at my brother's place most of the day. And now i'm home. My life is awfully boring.
I did get a new camera a few days ago! A Samsung ES28, a black one. I really love it.
Well, i'm gonna go to sleep now, i guess. Bye.

18.03.11

Today, i got sick. 39,4C fever, hell yeah. I don't think i've got much to say for my absence. I've had nothing to write about and that's it. This is also gonna be a short post. I'm just gonna say that JOOSEP wanted to see his name in a blog. Not mine, i know, i know, but 'tis better than nothing? Well, i'm gonna go and drink some tea. Bye.

06.03.11

You, three, make me so happy, i could cry. <3

01.03.11

Today was quite nice. I went home after school to find out that the clients of Tele2 could already buy the tickets to the 30 Seconds To Mars concert. Unfortunately i'm not a client, but i did get a ticket. So i'm one lucky bastard, i guess.
Right now i'm just eating cookies and about to make some hot cocoa. I don't think i'll bother to study today, so i'm just gonna read "The Red Pyramid", which my mom got for my sister, and enjoy the evening. See ya, maggots.

26.02.11

Today was quite miserable. Some people are a bit too dumb to notice the obvious. But whatever, their loss.

Fav song of the moment:

25.02.11

How about i just disappear and see what happens.

5.12.10

How the hell is December already? That doesn't make sense. It was October a second ago, i swear! Time really does fly...
Anywho, i'm completely ill. I had a fever yesterday. It's gone for now, but i still have a massive headache and a runny nose and i've been busy coughing my lungs out for the ast two days. Christ, this is annoying.
We celebrated Valeria's birthday on saturday. That was fun. We watched Brüno (never. again.), ate, drank (juice, ofc.), had a snowfight with a random dude (inside of the apartment, ofc.) and just had a great time.
Anyway, i'm gonna watch a movie now and drink some tea. Cya.

30.11.10

Bah, i'm ill. I felt like crap when i woke up today, so i just went to sleep again. And now i'm here, drinking tea and trying to heal. I have a piano exam today at 4PM. And a class after that. Fml. But i think i'm gonna do well at the exam, since i have practised the piece i have to play today, and it sounds quite good.
Also, there's so much snow on the ground that i can barely walk normally... What am i saying, i can't walk normally. Well, yesterday, after music school, a couple of friends decided that it's absolutely necessarry to throw me in a pile of snow. That's why i'm ill, i think, since i was comepletely soaked and had to go home. Oh well, it was fun, though.
I'm gonna make myself another cup of tea, and practise a bit of piano now. See ya laterz.

28.11.10

I had a nice weekend. I visited my unbiological brother and we celebrated his birthday from saturday 'til 4 o'clock today. When i arrived back at Tallinn, a friend of mine came to welcome me back, so we went to eat at a restaurant (well, it's not a real restaurant, a wannabe one), and then we went to enjoy the snowy view at Old Town. I'm pretty pleased with the last few days. Even though some things could be better then they are. Oh well, i'm gonna watch a movie now and then go to sleep. Bye.

25.11.10

Six high
up the sky,
eating the stars
alive,
kicked out by the society,
left to die by everything that's alive
and by everything
that's not.

Five high
up the sky,
sixth fell down,
laying on the ground,
only pieces left of
what used to be
a killermachine.

Four high
up the sky,
fifth blew up
trying to stop
the voices
trying to pull
his laces.

Three high
up the sky,
fourth sliced up
itself to avoid
destiny
that would end
with a bend.

Two high
up the sky,
third overdosed,
veins were closed
felt molested
second suggested
suicide.

One high
up the sky,
second was shot
by the first
and the last
and that's the whole cast
in this story.

Six down,
below the ground,
get out of my head,
you aren't my friends
stop pressuring me,
i don't want to
kill,
no more.

24.11.10

Exactly a month until Christmas. I wish Christmas wouldn't come. I wish nothing would come. I wish the time would stop. I just want to crawl to my bed and lie there for weeks. I don't know why i feel so tired all the time. I have no idea... I hate having to put on a smile whereever i go. I know i don't have to do it, actually, but people don't like sad people. And i don't want anyone to dislike me.

I got into a fight with my best friend yesterday. I won't write about the details, but it wasn't nice. It's weird not talking to her.

It seems like people around me are leaving. I hate it. Why won't you all just stay?

Wow, such a negative post. Well, shit happens, i feel like crap. I'm gonna go and make some tea. Bye.

Also, i don't know if you're reading this, but i miss you already.

23.11.10

I'm so tired.

21.11.10

Yesterday was a mess. A party that should've ended well. But it didn't. I ended up crying on a friend's shoulder. A friend i didn't even know i could actually call a friend. He supported me so well. He made me laugh. Truly laugh and smile from my heart. He told me things i won't share with anyone, but what made me happy on the inside. Even though i lost someone dear to me, i don't regret anything. It's all okay. I'm okay. I promise. Game over, baby.

20.11.10

Finally, home alone. I've been waiting for this for months. I can do whatever i want, until some of my friends come over for a party. Yay! I've been cleaning the whole morning now. I didn't really have to do it, but i wanted to. Which is weird, cause i hate cleaning. Oh well, i should go shopping to buy some drinks and food. But... For what money? I'll figure something out.

But i'm gonna go now, to shop and stuff, so bye!